the end

endings are always sad.

but i'm putting a period on this one with a smile.

i'm happy...finally.

this is jhong, signing out.

redemption

you might have noticed that i haven't written a decent blog entry for several weeks now.

it's the laziness in me.

or maybe it's just that i have found other fun and interesting things to do other than blogging.

lapit na sembreak. i promise to redeem myself by then.

Random Notes:

*no decent sleep. puro bar. kakasawa din pala.
*uno sa social dance. wuhooooo! thanks to my career mode pe mates.
*catv awards this week. as if i care.
*will go swimming with the bitches. ehehehe!
*hamster. mamatay na!

i'm a beach...or NOT

betsy, kat and i were talking about what we're going to do this sembreak and i realized that i haven't really been at the beach. that's a life goal. gulat na gulat si bets kasi ako lang daw ang kaisa-isang tao na alam niya hindi pa nakakapag-beach.



there's really no exact reason why i haven't experieced beaches. my sisters have had in the past with their friends. with the whole family? never been. i guess it's just that we don't really go out that much. we don't make time for it. usually, mall lang kame talaga. haaay. weird stuffs.

anyway, un lang. the year won't end without me going to thew beach! sana matuloy. or else.....

HARAKIRI!

chos.

Random Notes:

*First time at gov with gelo and kat. graaaaabbbbeee! un na.
*will go to BED next. tsk. Libre, sir galan!
*will watch sisterhood of traveling pants on wednesday. sama kayo.
*social dance madness. last meeting na sa saturday. yeah!
*lapit na sembreak. sa wakas.
*will not wait anymore. i'm happy.

ay nalaglag!

last week, nalaman ko na nagpalaglag ng anak yung kasambahay namin. sobrang nakakagulat. the day before she said it to us was the day she had her baby aborted. natulala ako for at least five minutes. hindi ko alam kung paaano magre-react. parang sumakit yung puso ko. masyado akong affected since kakapanganak nga lang ni ate so i really value life right now and how miraculous bearing a baby could be.

grabe talaga! rawr! tigre? chos.

Random Noes:

*I'm obviously too lazy to write a normal entry.
*Bought seven dvds. lahat series! ghost whisperer, medium, weeds, samantha who, pushing daisies, 30 rock and eli stone. still have to finish boston legal and chuck. wuhooo!
*Still reading "A Million Little Pieces". kailangan ko na matapos ito. i have to move on. ahahah!
*i'm feeding my soul with beauty and art. hmmm...
*will quit smoking. waaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaahhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhh!

wala

wala akong masulat.

sobrang wala.

alam mo yung wala?

ako yun.

wala akong naiisip.

puro wala.

andami nang wala.

pero minsan kapag sobra na ang wala.

unti-unting nawawala ang wala.

gets mo?

ako rin hinde. nakakatawa.

wala. nawawala.

nawawala.

nawawal.

nawawa.

nawaw.

nawa.

naw.

na.

n.

.

Random Notes:

*We qualified for the catv awards! galing ng hiphiphuriy productions.
*binyag na si king!
*watched "twenty questions" sa university of makati. even went backstage and met the cast. sayaaaaaaaaaaaaaa!

ricardo joaquin

yep, he's my newborn nephew!!!

Ricardo Joaquin V. Ayson was born on August 24, 2008. Just a day after my birthday. Go Virgo babies!

Haay, ang sarap ng feeling. Pangalawang pamangkin ko na ito. Ang cute talaga ng mga babies. Gusto ko narin. Wala nga lang akong matris. Takte!



He's so chinito. Grabe! May dimples pa si gago. Loves it.

Random Notes:

*Directing children's show. Pressssuuuureee!
*Eyebags galore.
*Pumapayat na ko. I'm loving stress.
*Sleep-deprived. Kasalanan 'to ng mga dormates ko. hehe!
*Qualified for CaTV awards. Go Nikka!
*Saw my cousin crush. Tsk. bad.
*Need new songs for my iPod.

nineteen

Nineteen starts tomorrow. I don’t know how I feel exactly. I guess I’m happy that I’ll be a year older. I have nothing against it unlike other people who complain about getting older. It actually gives me a great feeling. Confidence, I guess. I feel wiser. I feel more mature. I feel experienced. I feel that I can overcome any problems. Shoot.

Whenever my birthday comes, I have this unconscious habit of reflecting what my life has become. Have I learned anything? Have I really been wiser? More mature? Experienced? It’s hard to answer life questions. It’s even more painstakingly difficult to analyze who you are and what you have become. Only the people around you can make you realize that. I know one thing though and that is I know more.

I am babbling, sorry. Words escape me. I guess what I’m trying to say is that I am scared of what nineteen is going to give me, what experiences I would have at this age and what lessons I would learn along the way. And yet I can’t also wait for nineteen, to give me the excitement I’ve been longing forever, the friendships that would grow even more, and the love that has long been waiting for me at the end of this road.

Ah, to be a teenager! The last chapter in this part of my life.

Here’s to nineteen!

*Will watch Lea Salonga’s Cinderella tomorrow. With Ate Lecky. CCP.
*Will celebrate my birthday on Sunday.
*Papa’s home. He bought me a pair of shades with a built-in mp3 player. Cool subra!
*Chocolates overload. Eeeek! Never had a sweet tooth.
*Currently reading “A Million Little Pieces” by James Frey. Addicted! Pun intended for those who know the book.
*Current LSS: Old School Alanis Morissette. “Head Over Feet” is really is it! Ahaha!
*The week of No Classes. Boredom. I’d rather go to class. Weird me.
*Didn’t smoke from Sunday to Wednesday. Nakakagigil!
*New casing for my phone. Yey! 411: I had my phone since I was in 4th year High School. Antique na ‘to sakin. Attached na ko. Hehe!
*With Shandy last Wednesday. Saya!

plastic

Photo Taken By: Kristine Talusan
Courtesy of: Adrian Pacific Ong
Models: Adrian Pacific Ong and Frances Ogilvie

I’ve been plastic all my life. I’m not a bad person. I’m not mean. I’m just plain plastic. It’s necessary. If I weren’t plastic I probably would’ve been dead right now because my enemies had already killed me.

You can’t please everybody and people can’t always please you. In life, you encounter people that you just don’t get. You meet people and mingle and yet there’s something about them that you don’t like. What do you do? Be plastic.

You don’t snob them. That’ll just make things worse. You go about living your normal life without getting affected by these people you don’t like. You try to avoid being in their company just so you don’t have to be nice and all. But then eventually, these people would notice that you’re avoiding them and more so you don’t like them. How did they know? You backstabbed them. You told your friends that you hate this certain person. Word gets out and before you know it, everyone knows that you don’t like this certain person. And then, this certain person gives you the “if-you-have-to-say-something-bad-about-me-say-it-to-my-face” speech.

How do you respond to a confrontation like that? I probably would say the same thing that the great comedienne Kathy Griffin once did: “I don’t want to say anything to your face. Where’s the fun in that? I would actually wait after you leave then I’ll talk shit about you with my friends. In that sense, I get to be funnier making fun of you. Plus, there’s no conflict at all.”

I admit that it is wrong to be plastic but sometimes you have no choice but to be one. You want to avoid arguments so you act nice to those people that you don’t really like. It’s actually human nature. We usually hide what we truly feel.

Right now I am plastic to a certain group in my block. They understand each other and I really don’t get them. Whenever I see these people, I usually roll my eyes…in my mind. But when I’m around them I act like most angelic person there is, like I’m one of them.

It’s fun to be plastic. It’s thrilling. It makes living worthwhile. Ha!

Random Notes:

*Don’t ask me about the people I am being plastic to. I will never tell. Ask Pen. Haha!
*It’s my sister’s birthday!
*Prelims week is finally over.
*I was the lowest in the last SocioComm Test. I got 10/50. If I were in High School I probably would have cried about it for days.. But now, I don’t mind at all. I see the clearer picture. I’m aware. I didn’t study so I got a low grade, though I never expected to be the lowest. Haha! Will make bawi next time. Kaya ko ‘to!
*Pimple breakout.
*My birthday’s coming. Will be just another day. Here’s to 19!

confidence

Fake it ‘til you make it

--Pen


Pen was talking about confidence. I haven’t always been confident with the way I look. I used to be overweight and this is what caused my recurring low self-esteem. It’s something that I worked really hard to improve on. I started to work out. I did all kinds of diet and a lot of eating disorders came about. I was okay with it since I shed some wait over the past four years. I haven’t reached my desired weight and lately it has been a yo-yo ride for me looking in the mirror. Sometimes I like what I see but most of the time I don’t. I always ask my friends if I look okay or if the shirt I’m wearing doesn’t make me look fat. It’s already a bad habit.

This entry is not about my weight. What I really want to say is…

How come I had to do all these improvements in myself when there are people who would not even do a thing but still look great?!?!

There are people in this world who are naturally beautiful. I hate to say this but I envy these people. Impokrita na ang magsabi na kuntento na sila sa itsura nila kahit na ang chaka-chaka nila!

The tag line of “Nip/Tuck” comes to mind, “When you stop striving for perfection, you might as well be dead.”

These beautiful people wake up in the morning with their untidy hair and morning glories and can still be in a television commercial as the after shot. Why did God make all these creatures? It still is a mystery to me.

But then again, there are people who are not good looking but still exude that appeal. There is always something that attracts you to them. There’s that instant eye movement magnet that makes you stop and stare. Pen says it is confidence. I guess it’s true. Celine, our lovely dorm mate is not drop-dead gorgeous. She’s okay. But she always exudes this confidence that makes her appealing to men. I guess it’s the way she walks, the way she talks, the way she runs her fingers through her hair, the way she moves her eyes, the way she bites her lips. It’s really interesting…weirdly enough.

Pen advised me to do the same thing. Have that confidence.

But how?!? Fake it ‘til you make it. Act as if you’re confident even if you’re not. Walk as if you feel like everyone’s looking at your beautiful face. Talk as if what you have to say matters.

I will definitely try this one. Will exude appeal eventually. Haha!

But my dear readers, let’s not forget that beauty fades. The important thing is that you’re a good person…………….NOT.

*_____________________________*

I went to Alicia Keys’ concert last Tuesday and as what I expected, it was fun, fun fun! She was almost two hours late but it was well worth it. She gave great performances. I enjoyed “No One” the most. Galeng! “If I Ain’t Got You” was her finale. Goosebumps!

Outside the venue:


Inside (with my sister):


With the friends we met there:


Find the hidden alicia keys:


O eto nalang:

Random Notes:

*It's 08-08-08! End of the world. Chos!
*Went to Cavite for Travel Show. Cameraman me! Suuubrang kapagod.
*Despedida party on Sunday for my sister. She’s going to Canada…for good. Haay!
*I now have a portable dvd player. Saya!
*Of course, I bought new dvds. Mostly horror. Bwahahaahh!
*Watched ‘My Sassy Girl’. Nice nice! Sobrang enjoy. Hmmm…

hate entry

this is a hate entry to someone in particular. someone older. someone preganant. someone who should start taking stresstabs. ang laki ng eyebags mo!

grrrr! inis na inis ako sa kanya kahapon. i've been ranting about the pressure of our tv prod for the past few weeks. the time to shoot came yesterday. i was not really nervous since i knew we had something good. i knew that at least we were ready and that what we had was something commendable and very entertaining. i was so confident.

during the shoot itself, i was in my element. we had the right ad libs, the right jokes, the right questions to our guests. it was really a smooth flow. i felt that we would get a grade that was deserving of what we had. a high grade. more than what we wanted.

but i guess, i expected too much.

or maybe THAT professor was just out of her mind.

DEFINITELY the latter.

Pen and I were the host and lo and behold, we had the lowest grade out of all the members. 86.

I wasn't expecting the highest grade out of all the members...but to be the lowest?!?

SHIT!

Hindi narin kami qualified for the CATV awards. Parang gago!

Not to be arrogant, but PEN and I carried the show. What irritated me the most was that the professor kept laughing on our jokes. I could even hear her laugh all the way from the booth...and yet she gave us the lowest grade. WALA SIYANG KARAPATANG TUMAWA KUNG BIBIGYAN LANG NIYA KAMI NG MABABANG GRADE. WALA SIYANG KARAPATANG MAG-ENJOY!

Even our blockmates thought that our show was good. What's her fucking problem?!?

Nakakaburat talaga. Inis na inis ako kahapon at pagod na pagod kaya hindi na ko pumasok ng Spanish Class. Natulog lang ako buong magdamag! Haaaay, ayoko na makita pagmumukha niya. Anong gagawin ko?!?

BLINDFOLD!

Random Notes:

*It's August! 22 days to go before my bday.
*I already have my Alicia tickets!
*Fat still.
*Drunk last Wendnesday. this is becoming a habit. haaay!
*Will be interviewed for Dartz' talks show.
*MoA last tuesday. New shirt! YEY!
*Will remain single until further notice.

quotable quotes

haay, wala na naman itong kwenta. compilation lang ito ng mga quotes, sayings, lyrics, whatever na nabasa ko sa kung saan saan.

Love : my job is the most important job of all, since the world cant live without me..

Friendship: my job is important too you know, without friendship there will be hatred among people

Friendship: but sadly.. sometimes... i end up doing your job..

just when when i was about to say i need you
just when i was about to say please stay
just when i was about to pull the biggest catch of my life
is the day you run away
-Spelling Contest

No one watches you walking away without wanting to be with you.

love means never having to say your sorry"

If you couldn't be with the person that you love, I guarantee that hearing him promise you, love you, honor you and cherish you, no matter what, would be pretty much all you could think about." – Izzie, Grey’s Anatomy

I wish you'd look at me that way
Your beautiful eyes looking deep into mine
Telling me more than any words could say
But you don't even know I'm alive
Baby, to you all I am is the invisible man

thought to pick
the flower of forgetting
for myself,
but I found it
already growing in his heart.
- Ono no Komachi

I love walking in the rain, 'cause then no-one knows im crying...

Until God sends me my angel on earth to love and to cherish forever, I will be content to be alone. I have learned to swallow my loneliness like a bitter pill, hoping that my good behavior will make fate smile at me and say, "Here is the one for you. Live happily ever after, your name is written on his heart."

"I choose to love you in silence for in silence I receive no rejection. I choose to love you in loneliness for in loneliness, no one owns you but I. I choose to adore you from a distance for distance will shield us from pain. I choose to kiss you in the wind for the wind is gentler than my lips. I choose to hold you in my dreams for in my dreams, you have no end."

Waiting is painful. Forgetting is painful. But not knowing which to do is the worst kind of suffering.

"I can't unlove you anymore."

"Do you want me to tell you something really subversive? Love is everything its cracked up to be. That's why people are so cynical about it...it really is worth fighting for, being brave for, risking everthing for. And the trouble is, if you don't risk anything, you risk even more. "
Erica Jong

"Take this razor and write your name across my wrist, so everyone will know who left me like this"

"some men see things as they are, and say why. i dream things that never were, and ask why not"

"i love you without knowing how, when or from where. i love you simply without problems or pride. i love you this way for i dont know any other way of loving you."

I no longer love her, that's certain, but how i loved her.
Love is so short, forgetting is so long- Pablo Neruda

i'll say this once and i'll never say it again...
there's a kind of certainty that comes but once in a lifetime..."

"i am nothing special; of this i am sure. i am a common man with common thoughts, and i've led a common life. there are no monuments dedicated to me and my name will soon be forgotten, but i've loved another with all my heart and soul, and to me this has always been enough..."

. . . i close my eyes, then i wont see
the love you do not feel when you're holding me
morning will come
i'll do what's right
just give me til then to give up this fight
and i will give up this fight

i cant make you love me if you dont
you cant make your heart feel something it wont
here in the dark these final hours
i will lay down my heart
i'll feel the power but you wont . . .

2. CONCEITED PEOPLE NEVER HEAR ANYTHING BUT PRAISE - The Little Prince

3. YOU ARE BEAUTIFUL BUT YOU ARE EMPTY - The Little Prince

4. IT IS ONLY WITH THE HEART THAT ONE CAN SEE , NOT ALL THINGS ARE VISIBLE TO THE EYE. - The Little Prince

"In love, no one can harm anyone else; we are each of us responsible for our own feelings and cannot blame someone else for what we feel." from Paulo Coelho's Eleven Minutes

“How does one become a butterfly?” she asked.
“You must want to fly so much that you are willing to give up being a caterpillar.”

-- Hope for the Flowers by Trina Paulus

Bad stuff happens, Nicky... But you have to move on.. You just pick up your head, look at something nice like the sky or the ocean, and you move the hell on." - James Patterson, Suzanne's Diary for Nicholas


If you want to know me look inside your heart.

When you are content to be simply yourself and don't compare or compete, everybody will respect you.

Random Notes:

*I finally know my stand. I'm good.
*Missed Blackout. Will go next year. I promise myself.
*Still no ticket for AK concert.
*Uno sa Social Dance test.
*Text galore. Weird state.
*LTS test- Sunday. bad trip.
*TV Prod Live next week. Oh NuR!
*Reverie. Bonding. Miss...mwah!
*New Songs sa iPod. Wuhooo! thanks my juliebug.
*Assignments=tamad
*No revisions yet for scriptwriting.
*Piliting mag-inuman tomorrow. will sleep at betsy's place.
*Shortage of money...as usual.
*Fat!

manunulat

Sabi ng marami na ang pinakamahirap na harapin, lalo na para sa isang manunulat, ay ang blangkong papel. Marami kang naiisip. Maraming kang konsepto. Marami kang gustong sabihin. Eh ano ngayon? Mahirap buuin ang bawat salita upang makabuo ng isang pangungusap na may katuturan. Mahirap ilapat sa papel ang nais mong sabihin na hindi ka magmumukhang bobo.

Hindi ako magaling na manunulat. Sinusubukan ko. Kung minsan ay wala nalang talaga akong masabi kaya pinapaikut-ikot ko nalang lahat ng sinasabi ko. Kung minsan ay paulit-ulit nalang. Paulit-ulit. Paulit-ulit. Paulit-ulit. Paulit-ulit. Paulit-ulit. Paulit-ulit.

Ngayon, wala nalang talaga akong masulat. Kunwari may sense itong sinasabi ko tungkol sa pagiging isang writer. Pero sa totoo, wala itong sense. Kunwari lang talaga. Medyo tamad ako these past few days. Marami akong iiisip. Long overdue na nga itong blog entry na ito. Basta promise ko, this Friday may katuturan na ang susunod kong entry. Humanda kayo. Bwahahahahahaha!

Random Notes:

*Lapit na concert ni Alicia Keys. Wala pa kong ticket.
*TV PROD. Hihimatayin na ko sa pressure. I just want to get it over with.
*Travel Show naman. Presenting…..Asturias. Joke.
*Nanood ng “100” ng Cinemalaya. The best ito. Nanalo si Mylene Dizon ng best actress!
*May new look ang room namin ni Gelo. Nagulat ako bigla niyang inayos. Saya!
*Will wait…as always. No need to hurry. The past week has been the best week of my life. You should never forget that. I’ll miss you.

my now-lifestyle

ang hirap na talaga magtipid ngayon lalo na na naka-dorm na ko. napagalitan pa ko ng nanay ko dahil umuwi lang ako ng bahay para kumuha ng pera.

Mama: Bat ka nagigipit eh sobra sobra na nga ung binibigay ko sayo?!?!?!
Ako: Eeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeehhhhhhhhhhhhhh!

Hindi ko talaga ma-explain kung bakit ang gastos ko eh puro pagkain lang naman ang pinanggagamitan ko nun. Pinlano ko pa ang magdala ng sardinas para makatipid. But the truth is...Sardinas is like eeeewwwieeee. Pangmahirap! (ito ay joke lamang. sana walang ma-offend.)

Hindi na nga ako nakakapag-starbs eh. It's like my daily routine pa naman. It's so upsetting! I'm so like so choosy pa naman when it comes to my coffee.

I really hate this kind of lifestyle. There's no aircon. It's so enet! Whenever I put OLAY on my face, it just moists all over. grrrr! sayang lang my pera. I have to take care of my skin pa naman.

UPSET AKO. UPSEEEETTT! chos.

Random Notes:

*Waaah! Pinsan ng blockmate ko si Social Dance cutie. Oh NO! pero i can't wait for tomorrow. Sobrang stalker mode ako sa multiply and friendster account niya.
*Wednesday is Betsy's day.
*Salvador sucks. He sucks me. Joke.
*Pierce is an issue. Rawr!
*We FOX as one.
*Download Mariah's new single "I'll Be Lovin' U Long Time". Super fun song!

luha

Hindi ako iyakin. Kung bibilangin ko kung ilang beses ako umiiyak sa isang taon, siguro mga dalawa lang. Hindi ko alam kung bakit ako ganito. Hindi ako manhid. Hindi ako robot na walang kahit anumang emosyon. Siguro hindi ko lang hinahayaang tabunan ako ng aking kalungkutan. Hindi ko ipinaparamdam sa sarili ko na kailangan nang ilabas ang bawat sakit, galit at pighati.

Masiyahin akong tao. Kapag kasama ko ang aking mga kaibigan, masaya ako. Palabiro. Hindi mo mababakas sa aking mukha ang kalungkutan, kakulangan.

Ngayong ako’y may sarili nang tinitirahan sa may paaralan, madalas ay napag-iisa ako. Sa mga tahimik na sandali lalo na’t kapag kalaliman na ng gabi, ako’y nagiging isang lobo. Joke. Mali, sorry. Uulitin ko.

Ngayong ako’y may sarili nang tinitirahan sa may paaralan, madalas ay napag-iisa ako. Sa mga tahimik na sandali lalo na’t kapag kalaliman na ng gabi ay natatagpuan ko ang sarili na nag-iisip. Maraming bumabagabag sa aking isipan. Marami akong frustrations sa buhay. Ang bata-bata ko pa at pakiramdam ko’y pasan ko na ang mundo.

Sa aking paghiga sa kama, hindi ko namalayang may tumutulo na palang luha sa aking kaliwang pisngi. Hindi ko ito inasahan. Pinunasan ko ito gamit ang aking mga palad. Ngunit natuyo man ang unang luha ay paulit-ulit itong napalitan ng panibago.

Hindi ko na napigilan ang pag-iyak. Humagulgol ako. Sinubukang pigilan ang bawat hikbi gamit ang malabot na unan sa tabi. Ang bawat luhang tumulo ay isang piraso ng aking pagkatao.

Unang luha: Pagbabago sa Pamilya
Ikalawang luha: Mga luma at panibagong mga Kaibigan
Ikatlong luha: Aberya sa Pag-aaral
Ikaapat na luha: Patuloy na paghahanap ng Pag-ibig
Ikalimang luha: Ang walang katiyakang Hinaharap.

Iniyakan ko ang lahat. Kahit ang mga hindi mahahalagang bagay ay isinama ko na sa aking pag-iyak. Tutal, one time big time lang naman ‘to diba? Once in a blue moon lang nangyayari.

Hindi ako iyakin ngunit sa pagkakataong iyon ay hinayaan kong tabunan ako ng kalungkutan. Ipinaramdam ko sa sarili na kailangan nang ilabas ang bawat sakit, galit at pighati.

Aaminin ko, masarap ang pakiramdam matapos umiyak. Para bang nakahinga ako ng napakaluwag. Parang ang dati-rati’y pasan kong mundo ay unti-unting lumutang mula sa aking mga balikat.

Tumayo ako mula sa aking pagkakahiga. Pumunta ako sa may salamin. Tiningnan ko ang sarili. Oily. Pero ayos lang. Masaya ako na nalabas ko na ang lahat. Ngumiti ako at tumawa. Tinawan ko ang aking pag-iyak. Nababawan ako. Lumakas pa lalo ang tawa ko. Humahalaklak na. Parang baliw lang.

Pumunta ako ng banyo at naghilamos. Ang sarap ng malamig na tubig. Nagkuskos ng bonggang-bongga. Nagsipilyo ng ngipin.

Bumalik ako ng kwarto, nagpunas, nagbihis.

Napadaan ako muli sa may salamin. Tiningnan ang sarili sa pangalawang pagkakataon. Hindi ako umiyak. Hindi ako tumawa. Naglagay lang ako ng Olay facial cream which fights the seven signs of skin aging.

Random Notes:

*fiNALLY, a long entry. Hindi na ko tinamad!
*Monday, bangag kagad. Inuman with Behavioral Science friends.
*Buong one week sa dorm. I miss family. hihi!
*Sleepover at Betsy's place.
*NSTP on Sunday. Grrrr!
*Shortage of Money. As in.
*RIce binging. Taba!
*Social Dance distraction. Habang sumasayaw ako ay biglang may nag-shirtless na classmate. Na-distract ako at nawala sa sayaw. tsk. napagalitan pa ko. Kasi naman eh... KUNG GUSTO NYO AKO MAKAPAG-CONCENTRATE, WAG KAYO MAGHUHUBAD SA HARAP KO LALO NA KUNG MAY BULGING BICEPS AT ROCK HARD ABS KAYO!
*Gateway with the "pekpeks". Hindi bastos name nyo ah!
*TV Prod exhaustion.

action

i haven't been out for a while.

i was always so shy.

i was not confident.

i felt that i didn't deserve what I wanted.

but my guide tells me to do something.

to not slack off.

if i want to achieve that one goal,

i should take some action.

wala nang hiya-hiya.

Random Notes:

*Shortage of Money
*COmp Shop. Loser na ko!
*Social Dance cutie.
*Di pa kami nagpapansinan ng baby ko. Isusulot ko na siya. bwahahahah!
*May stitches si Panpan sa ulo. Nahulog kasi sa bike. Wawa naman.
*My block's getting better. Medyo masaya na. Yey!

shut

talking is my defense mechanism.

it's my big mouth that always gets me in trouble.

i just can't seem to keept it shut.

in the end, it's me who always feels uncomfortable.

the awkwardness never stops.

i try to be friendly.

i try to be the first one to approach, make the first move.

i don't know what other people think of me.

i can't say that i don't care because i really do.

i hate it.

i feel uneasy when i learn that someone doesn't like me.

i should stop.

right now.

at this very moment.

i stop.

now, i will try my very best to just BE.

let everything flow through.

i shall not care.

i will try not to try.

shit.

talking is my defense mechanism.

Random Notes:

*TV Prod=pressure
*Balay is the place to be
*I now sleep comfortably.
*Was sick for two days. haaay!
*Kilig moments here and there. Wala namang pinatutunguhan.
*Señor is just so cute (Spanish prof)
*Want to watch "Made of Honor"

resolution update

It’s the end of the year’s first half and I would just like to update you with my resolutions. May nasunod ba? Hmmm…

10. Take my studies lightly.

Sure na nasunod ko ‘to. Ahahah! Kahit na nag-summer classes ako, masaya parin. I take everything one day at a time.

9. Continue my no-rice diet and my exercise routine.

Huhu! I eat rice once again. Di ko na kaya. Mahihimatay ako. I still exercise once in a while, hindi na regular.

8. Be patient.

I can safely safe that I have been very impatient. I did what I said that I would never do until…haaay, ayoko na mag-elaborate.

7. Avoid cracking offensive jokes.

Yung mga taong pinapatamaan ko lang ang makakasagot nito. Haha! I hope I never offended them.

6. Read a book at least once a month

I still read books but it’s not a monthly thing. I am currently reading “Can’t Buy Me Love.”

5. Be a good friend.

I am not perfect but I know that I’ve done everything I could to be a good friend.

4. Be selfless.

I’ve been definitely selfless. Lagi ko na ngang iniisip ang ibang tao.

3. Be a good son and a good brother.

I haven’t been the best son and brother but I know that I’ve been good. I’m okay.

2. Update this blog every Friday.

This is the resolution that I’ve just broken yesterday when I failed to update this blog. I still placed this one as a Friday entry, though.

1. I will never cut my hair and never shave any facial hair for the whole year.

Failure. Tsk.

Random Notes:

*Sorry if I don’t have concrete updates with the resolutions.
*Dorm=independence=fun
*Will buy Amy Winehouse concert dvd
*Grey's Anatomy's Finale was amazing. Grabe! Sobra! Lahat na! Watched it on youtube.
*Haven’t watched television for four days.
*Need to control spending money
*Classes=new=uncomfortable=weird
*He’s my blockmate which makes going to classes worthwhile.

class sked

Classes start on Wednesday and I am very excited. Tuloy na ang aking pagdo-dorm with Gelo. Finally. This was a frustrating week. Anyway, here’s my schedule for my third year first semester:

Monday

11-2pm SURVEY OF WORLD LITERATURE 1
3-6pm ADVERTISING PRINCIPLES

Tuesday

No Classes (my only break!)

Wednesday

3-6pm PAGBASA AT PAGSULAT SA IBA’T IBANG DISIPLINA
6-9pm SCRIPTWRITING FOR RADIO/TV

Thursday

9-12nn TV PRODUCTION
1-4pm ELEMENTARY SPANISH

Friday

3-6pm EXPERIMENTAL PSYCHOLOGY

Saturday

7-9am SOCIAL DANCE
9-12nn COMMUNICATION AND SOCIO-CULTURAL CHANGE (wtf?!?)

Sunday

LTS

Let me tell you, I have a very short attention span and having a class for three hours straight (or gay) would kill me. I don’t know how I would handle all of these. May lts pa ako at p.e.

Random Notes:

*My mom and I were watching tv and then she blurted out, “Sino ba yan mukhang bakla!” She was referring to Rihanna in the Maroon 5 video of “If I Never See Your Face Again.” My mom just cracks me up. She had a point though. Rihanna has already strong features and cutting her hair that shorter just made her look more manly. No offense.
*Grey’s Anatomy and Brothers & Sisters had the best back-to-back episodes last Monday. Kudos!
*Alicia Keys will have a concert here in Manila on August 5, 2008. will watch!
*Ang laki ng kickback ko sa enrollment. Nakakakonsensya. I will use it naman for a good cause eh. (Alicia keys concert). Haha! Bad, jhong, Bad. Tuwad!
*Went to MoA last Tuesday. Splurged. Bought new jeans, shirt and a sweater. Bread Talk. First time to eat a Haagen Dazs ice cream. Anyway, wala namang pinagkaiba sa Selecta. Mahal lang.
* I thought this reshuffling thing would do its part in making me single no more. Tsk.
*Ron’s house today. Bonding before school starts.
*Belated Happy Birthday to Karen!
*Advanced Happy Birthday to Dartz, Julie and Jam!
*Julie, punta akong Bulacan…makakain lang sa party mo. Ahahaha! Pa-cheeseburger ka nalang sa pasukan. Wuhoooo!

change

Being yourself may not be the best thing to do especially if “yourself” is not a very good person. I’ve been trying constantly to change who I am physically and emotionally, not because I’m tired of being myself but because it is what society dictates me to do. I am gay and people always have the stereotypes of what a gay guy should look like. No, it’s not the cross-dressing part or the make-up and wigs. Since society itself has changed, it now associates gays with new things. It’s the hair, the tight-fitting shirt, the skinny jeans and the pouting whenever a camera is present. This is how gays look like today. The funny thing is that all hot gay guys look exactly the same. It’s like a scientist made clones for everyone to enjoy.

RoboGay: Hi, I’m a hot gay guy. I’ll be your entertainer for today!

Which bring us to what Gelo said to me, “Kaya walang lumalandi sa’yo eh. Mukha ka paring lalaki.” Friends have always said this to me. I don’t fit the norm of gay people. But then again, my voice always gives me away. Once I open my mouth and talk, people would know that I am indeed gay. But what if I don’t talk at all?

For a moment, I tried to fit in to the gay box. I did a makeover to myself with the help of Gelo and somehow we all thought it worked. Ginela would always tell me, “Oy, that (gay) guy is looking at you. Kilig!” and my assuming self agreed. I enjoyed it. It was of course an ego booster in every angle.

After a while, I got really tired of it all. It’s exhausting to be someone that you’re really not. It seemed like I was part of a play that would never end. Inside of me was a voice that wanted to shout, “Close the fucking curtains already! I’m done.”

It wasn’t me. I always thought of myself as someone who just wanted to be with my friends and hang-out. It is okay to meet new people but growing relationships with the one you already have is much more valuable.

I remember what Reverie said about another person who was greeting a lot of people, “Kaibigan kasi ‘yan ng bayan eh.”

And then last Wednesday while on our way to Gateway, Chandra said, “Mag-bar ka kasi para makahanap ka na ng boylet.” The thing is I am not a bar person and I am probably the most boring person to be in a bar with. First, I’m a morning person. I am most likely to be the first one to pull my friends away and ask to go home. Second, I TRY (I’m not saying I don’t) not to drink and smoke. Third, I don’t want to meet a guy in a bar. I guess it’s just me but I don’t think it’s the most romantic place to meet someone.

People say that the only constant thing in this world is change. This is probably true but only if the change you undergo is for the better. I am not saying that I am better than the gay guys who fit the norm because I am clearly not. I just don’t want to lose myself through the process. I did all the changes so that I could find my “someone” already and I don’t want that. I don’t want to change for a person. I just want to be loved for who I am.

Eh bat ikaw...

Would you change for someone to love you?

Random Notes:

*I was a bit disappointed with the last episode of Your Song. Though it had a pseudo-happy ending, it wasn’t the ending I wanted. Kulang. Bitin.
*The new McDo commercial is just plain kadiri especially the part where he tried to drink the water spurting out of the car.
*I am loving “My Girl”. Even if all of them look like cartoons, I think Kim is doing very well with her character. I’m glad she’s pulling it off. Kahit minsan OA na pero 'yun talaga siguro yung hinihingi ng role niya.
*Addicted to Amy Winehouse. Kahit durugista, okay lang. Ganda ng songs!
*It was really weird asking my blockmates their new sections. Ang sakit sa puso!
*While on our way home from Gateway, Kat and I saw a huge billboard of Chris Tiu modeling Hanford. He was just wearing a black sando. The biceps mhen-->Makalaglag panty at brief, makapigtas bra, makatulo mens. Lahat na! Ang amo pa ng mukha niya, mukhang masarap alagaan. Joke.
*I wanna watch Sex and the City so badly. I was big fan of the show when it was still airing on HBO. I miss Carrie, Miranda, Charlotte and of course Samantha! Okay, I just want to see Jason Lewis again. Rawr! Will watch next week after I enroll para may kick back. Sa Alabang nalang siguro ako manonood para sundo ni mama. Yipee!
*I opened my Friendster profile for everyone. Wala namang sikreto dun eh. Search niyo ko ah: “Jhong Valencia”. Add me up. Yey!
*Thank You to Esfrey, Meann, Vanie, Tere and Kat for the ego boosters last Wednesday. Sige na Kat, feeler na ko. Haha!
*Sabi ni Lou, sumingkit daw ako lalo. Waaaah! wala na kong mata.
*Miss ko na comments ni cely, liz at tonton. Busy na siguro sila kasi lapit na pasukan.
*It’s the last Friday of May.
*June, here I come. Parang hinihintay ako ni June ah. Ngye corny!

your song

Brothers and Sisters
Six Feet Under
Will and Grace
Queer as Folk
Ugly Betty
Hollyoaks (UK)
Forbidden Love (Germany)
Les Bleus (France)
Clara Sheller (France)

These are tv shows which have prominent gay characters. I watched the first five on dvd and the others on YouTube (thank God!).

It is sad that here in the Philippines, we rarely see shows with a gay character.

But then, this month’s ‘Your Song’ on ABSCBN finally has..not one but three gay characters and it IS centered on a gay storyline. From the first time I saw the teaser, I knew that I would glue myself to the television to watch this one. I’ve never been more excited about a show since the first book of ‘Maging Sino Ka Man’ (the second one was bleh!).



This month’s Your Song with the title “Without You” is a milestone in Philippine Television History. It’s the first time that the lead character is a clear representation and a more realistic portrayal of a gay man. The story is everything gay and it is a love story. The theme song is sung by Erik Santos which makes it even gayer!



Joross Gamboa is Bobby. Victor Basa is John. Cathy Gonzaga is Jen. Bobby likes John. John is Jen’s brother. Jen likes Bobby.

Bobby is a Culinary Arts graduate and the chef of their restaurant. John is a Law graduate who has already taken, and unfortunately, failed the Bar Exams twice so he needs to take it again. Jen happens to be the sweet, caring, and loving sister of John.
Bobby will do everything just to get John’s attention and Jen will not stop until she gets Bobby’s heart. She would always give gifts and bake something for Bobby.

Bobby confides his problems to his chef best friend (Lui Villaruz).



I applaud the writers for a great story.

Joross is amazing and very much TOO convincing that I have to wonder if he really is gay.

Lui Villaruz sucks as the best friend. Mediocre acting.

Victor Basa is okay. Not so good but not bad either.

Cathy Gonzaga is wonderful. Hilarious. Likeable.

This show has very memorable lines like:

“Janice is you” –Bobby to John (yung mga nanonood lang ang makaka-gets nito)

“Hindi kita puwedeng mahalin KASI MAHAL KA NG KAPATID ko.” –John to Bobby

Bobby: Ako muna
John: Hindi, ako muna

It’s hard to watch this show since it’s every Sunday and my sisters are all in the house and I find it very difficult to sneak and watch it without them raising an eyebrow. Damn!

The last episode is on Sunday. I don’t want it to end yet!

Random Notes:

*Belated Happy Birthday to Shandy! I had fun last Wednesday.
*I overheard some guy at Shandy’s party saying, “Ang galing ni David Hortaleza sa American Idol”. He was obviously joking and it was so funny.
*David Cook won American Idol. I wanted Archuleta to win but I guess Cook deserved it.
*No reshuffling. Yey!
*Watching a lot of videos on YouTube. Overload na!
*Downloaded Chico and Del’s Top Ten. I just discovered the site recently. I downloaded a lot. I love Chico. Is he gay?
*Few weeks ago, I found out that “Bleeding Love” was actually written by the front man of OneRepublic and chenen…Jesse McCartney. Who would’ve thought?
*Crash No More: We just had everything re-installed. Yey!
*Meet up with Kat later. Starbs! God, I miss her. Kaaaaaaaaattttttttttt!!!!!!!!!!!!

crashed

I'm really bummed right now because our pc just crashed. I'm in a computer shop and I cannot write a decent entry. I'll just share to you my current favorite song. ahaha! koneksyon.

It's another "we belong together"-kind of song from Mariah Carey. Ang sakit sa puso! Kumusta naman.




Lyrics:

I STAY IN LOVE

Oh baby
Baby, I stay in love with you

Dying inside cause I can't stand it
Make or break up
Can't take this madness
We don't even really know why
All I know is baby
I try and try so hard
To keep our love alive

If you dont' know me at this point
Then I highly doubt you ever will
I really need you to give me
That unconditional love I used to feel
It's no mistaking
We're just erasing
From our hearts and minds

And I know we said let go
But I kept on hanging on
Inside I know it's over
You're really gone
It's killing me
Cause there ain't nothing
That I can do
Baby, I stay in love with you

And I keep on telling myself
That you'll come back around
And I try to front like "Oh well"
Each time you let me down
See I can't get over you now
No matter what I do
But baby, baby
I stay in love with you

Na na na na na na na na na
Na na na na na na na na na
Na na na na na na na na na
Baby, I stay in love with you

It cuts so deep
It hurts down to my soul
My friends tell me
I ain't the same no more
We still need each other
When we stumble and fall
How we gon' act
Like what we had
Ain't nothin' at all now

Hey, what I wanna do is
Ride shotgun next to you
With the top down like we used to
Hit the block
Proud in the SUV
We both know our heart is breaking
Can we learn from our mistakes
I can't last one moment alone
Now go I know

We said let go
But I kept on hanging on
Inside I know it's over
You're really gone
It's killing me
Cause there ain't nothing
That I can do
Baby, I stay in love with you

And I keep on telling myself
That you'll come back around
And I try to front like "Oh well"
Each time you let me down
See I can't get over you
Now no matter what I do
Baby, baby
I stay in love with you

We said let go
But I kept on hanging on
Inside I know it's over
You're really gone
It's killing me
Cause there ain't nothing
That I can do
Baby, I stay in love with you

And I keep on telling myself
That you'll come back around
And I try to front like "Oh well"
Each time you let me down
See I can't get over you
Now no matter what I do
But baby, baby
I stay in love with you

I stay in love
Love
Oh, I stay in love.

Random Notes:

*Monday: Finals on Finance. Last day!
*Will start working out. Career kung career!
*Done with the new hairstyle. Back to the old one.

the inevitable

It’s inevitable that this is a mother’s day entry.

It’s really sad that this coming Sunday, my mom will not be with us because she’s been in Bora with friends since yesterday. Sosyalan! Sa Monday pa balik niya.

If I had to describe my mother with just one word, it would have to be GENEROUS. She is the most giving person I know. That’s why God also gives her a lot of blessings back. It’s karma.

Anyway, people always say that they want their own mother to be their bestfriend.

Well I don’t.

What do I do with a bestfriend?

Probably laugh, tell jokes, share problems, talk about crushes and sex stuffs.

I don’t want to do those things with my mother…especially the last two. Siguro pwede pa ‘yung laugh and tell jokes because my mom has a very good sense of humor. But crushes and sex? No way!

I want my mom to be A MOM. I still want her to be strict, to make rules, to text me just to know where I am and that I am safe, to give me money (har!); to do all the things that parents do and still make time to bond with me and have the most fun ever!

I love my mom. I’m not going to say that she’s the best mom in the world because, well, maybe she isn’t. Hahahaha!

But to me, she’s the best. I Love you Ma! Happy Mother’s Day!

Random Notes:

*I kept it short. I didn’t want to bore you with all my seriousness.
*Mariah got married. Bummer!
*Summer Classes will end next week. Wuhoo!
*Hoping that Nicole of PBB goes home tomorrow. Ang landing bata! Okay lang rin kung si Rona.
*Bought a new bag. Yey!
*Apparently, the character of Eric (Gossip Girl) is gay. Nice one!
*Kevin and Scotty (Brothers and Sisters) are getting married. Sweet.
*Watched pilot of “Samantha Who” last Sunday. Christina Applegate was hilarious.
*Nothing much this week. Konting kakiligan.
*I’m planning to have my eyebrows pierced again tomorrow. Ahahah! Tsk.

someone better

I was listening to RX once again and the topic for their top ten of the day was “the difficult choices of your life.” One guy texted: I think I found my soulmate, my one great love. But the thing is I have a girlfriend of eight years. Though we’re not really having any problems, I just think that I would be happier with the other girl. Should I break up with my girlfriend and pursue the other girl or should I stay with my girlfriend and forever wonder what could’ve been?

Those were not his words exactly. I just rephrased it but you get the drift, right? Anyway, if I would be in the same situation, I probably would’ve gone crazy at this very moment. Mahirap talaga solusyonan ang ganyang problema. You really don’t know what choice to take and what decision to make.

I have never been in love. It’s true. All I had were what I call “Extreme Infatuation” which lasted for a month or two. So whatever opinion I will give about this issue are not based from any experience and should not be taken so seriously. I just want to give my two cents on the issue.

I have a couple of friends who broke up with their respective boyfriends because they thought that the other guys they found were better than the previous ones. Is this the right mindset?

Joe D’ Mango’s statement comes to mind: Love is not finding someone better. It is staying with the one you found and making it work.

True.

But there is a dilemma: What if the other girl IS REALLY your soulmate and that you would really be happier with her, what would you do?

MY OPINION: You can never be sure if the other girl is your soulmate. The fact remains that no matter what happens, you will always find someone better. You can say that I am siding with Joe D’ Mango because, what the hell, he is the MAN when it comes to love. But what he said is definitely true. You also have to take into consideration the feelings of your current girlfriend. Kawawa naman siya. She’s not perfect and so is the other girl you found. And that other girl you found have flaws that you may not like as well. Pareho lang din! I think all you need is to make things more fun with your current girlfriend. Spice things up. Do activities you’ve never done before. Make it exciting once again. Get that ‘kilig’ factor just like the first time. Remember what you love about your girlfriend in the first place. Go from there.

THE VERDICT: Forget the other girl. Stay with your girlfriend. Make it work. Spark things up.

In the end, you’ll realize that you’ve just made the right choice!

Random Notes:

* Pwede ko na ata palitan si Joe D’ Mango. Career ito!
* I am now sporting the ‘gay hairstyle’. You know, the one with the quasi-Mohawk with the side bangs and stuff. Gets? Gelo made me do it. He’s making me gayer everyday. I love it, though. It’s Siriano-fierce!
*Speaking of Gelo, he introduced me to a guy last Wednesday whose name is Patrick Valencia. Same as mine. The catch is…he’s gay too. Grabe! That is so COINCIDENCE INCARNATE. Sorry for using ‘incarnate’ once again. I know it’s getting old. Can’t help it. Sorry. Ang galing kasi! Sobrang coincidence.
* Maligno’s pilot was exceptional. I got to see Rafael Rossel’s butt crack for a split second. I wonder how it passed the MTRCB’s standards.
* My iPod has a new case and it’s purple. Ang bakla talaga!
* I bought new dvds of “Love In The Time Of Cholera”, Seasons 3 and 4 of “Project Runway” and Seasons 3, 4 and 5 of “Will and Grace.” Marathon na!
*Uno prelim grade ko sa Finance. Fair enough. Yabang. Ahahaha!
*Failed to watch “Manay Po 2”. Meron pa ba? My mom keeps bugging me to watch “When Love Begins…” with her. Eh ayoko talaga nun eh!
*Nag-report na kami ni eng blockmate ko. Okay naman. Hihi!
*MAY na! Grabe, time flies by so fast.
*I hope either Jolas or Rona goes home tomorrow.

spoiled me.

So I guess I’m spoiled. Being the only son and the youngest one, it has always been evident that I am the favorite of my mother. I tell you, my sisters would attest to that. Remember my post last week? I posted a picture of a Mariah freebie, the iPod skin. I wrote that I had no use for it because I didn’t have an iPod. Last Monday, I talked to my mom using my most “malabing-paawa-effect” voice:

Me: Ma, ang ganda nung libreng iPod skin ni Mariah.
Mom: Oo nga eh.
Me: Sayang wala naman akong iPod.
Mom: Magkano ba yun?
Me: Meron sa greenhills. 6K lang. Second hand. (halatang nag-research na eh noh?)
Mom: O sige, bili ako bukas.
Me: Yehey!

I never really thought that she would buy the iPod. When I got home last Tuesday, to my surprise…CHENEN!



The funny thing is, we believe that the iPod was snatched from someone before we bought it because there were still photos of the girl in it. Wawa nga eh! I think she’s still in highschool. But then again, I’m so happy that I have the iPod. Boo Hoo!

Since I wrote about my “summer friends” last week, I would just like to share few pictures we took yesterday:


Clockwise: starting from me, and then Gelo, Ginela, Julia and Kareen. The other girl in the next pic is Celine (the funniest girl ever!)





Random Notes:

*I haven't used the iPod skin. Pagsasawaan ko muna yung pagiging plain niya.
*Kevin’s dad is getting on my nerves. Good thing he’s leaving tomorrow.
*Addicted to Project Runway. Christian Siriano is fierce, fabulous and flawless. Haha!
*Remember the deed? Same thing this week. I guess I can only do it on weekends. Is this a sign from the heavens above?
*Heat attack.
*Climate change. It rains once in a while.
*Ryan Eigenmann got so thin! I saw him in Lobo. I want to lose more weight!
*Maligno’s trailer is amazing! Will watch this one.
*Mariah’s album--#1.
*I have an engineering blockmate in English. Sabi ko sa mga friends ko na cute siya. The next day, they kept teasing me. As in kapag magre-recite siya, they would go like “Jhong, uy…si Jhong. Yihee” Sobrang nakakahiya. Pati si Ma’am Cruz nanggatong pa, “Ito talagang si Mr. Valencia, sinusundan pa ng tingin.” Sobra! I was an EMBARRASSMENT INCARNATE. Grrr! Ma’am Cruz even assigned the two of us to be partners in a report. Waaaah!

playlist

I like music a lot. So I would just like to give you a list of what’s on my playlist at the moment. It’s mostly Pop/R&B/Mellow. I never really liked Rock especially OPM Rock/Alternative/Emo/Whatever-you-want-to-call-it kind of music. I have nothing against it. Just not my cup of tea.

My Playlist:

1. All the songs from Mariah’s new album. (Hindi talaga ‘to mawawala)
2. Never Letchu Go- Janet Jackson (mellow song from her latest album.)
3. Bleeding Love- Leona Lewis (hindi parin ako nagsasawa! Evah!)
4. I Remember- Keyshia Cole (Huhu! Tearjerker song.)
5. Everywhere I Go- Katharine McPhee (ganda ng beat.)
6. Take A Bow- Rihanna (another hit)
7. If That’s Okay With You- Shayne Ward (gwapo siya eh. Catchy song!)
8. Love Like This- Natasha Bedingfield ft. Sean Kingston (Sheyo Ariel!)
9. Superstar- Lupe Fiasco (ganda ng chorus. Yun lang!)
10. Back Into You- Amber Davis (infairness ha!)
11. Leavin’- Jesse McCartney (G5 G5)
12. Love Song- Nancy Jane (alam niyo bang si Nancy Castiliogne talaga siya? Kinahihiya kong gusto ko ito. Kaso sobrang catchy talaga. LSS mhen!)
13. Love In This Club- Usher (I’m just glad he has a new song)
14. 4 minutes- Madonna feat. Justin Timberlake (and her too!)

Songs From The Past…Nostalgic Indeed:

1. Foolish- Ashanti
2. This Side- Nickel Creek
3. True- Ryan Cabrera
4. Doesn’t Really Matter- Janet Jackson
4. All I Have- Jennifer Lopez ft. LL Cool J
5. Dilemma- Nelly ft. Kelly Rowland
6. If You’re Not The One- Daniel Bedingfield
7. I Knew I Loved You- Savage Garden
8. I Wanna Know- Joe
9. No Scrubs- TLC
10. Nice and Slow- Usher

Since we're on the topic of music, I FINALLY GOT MY MARIAH CD!!!



Since I reserved my copy, I also got some freebies!!!

a. Reservation Card


b. VIP Card (who knows for what?)


c. iPod Skin (don't have an iPod--no use)


d. Poster



Random Notes:

*I posted this one after I got home from school because the server wasn't working this morning.
*Summer Classes=haggard. But then again, I’m so happy with my new friends! Pwede ko na ipagpalit ang block ko. Joke lang!
*Sleep Deprived.
*Haven’t watched PBB since Sunday.
*I’ve seen episodes of Lobo though and Piolo seems to be shirtless all the time. Is this their way of boosting their ratings? Hmm…
*That colgate/close-up (sorry I forgot) guy (the one who’s inviting people to send videos) is kinda cute. Wag lang siya magsalita.
*Haven’t done the deed since classes started. Record Breaking! Wala na kong time and stamina. Pagod lagi. Sorry for the conservative people out there. Sharing lang.
*C2 overload
*Missing my blockmates
*Classes end on May 20. Can’t Wait.
*I saw Ma’am Cielo. She’s pregnant once again. Ang hilig!
*Ma’am Cruz told us that the four sections of third year CA will be re-shuffled and trimmed down to three sections. I don’t want to believe it until June comes. I’m a bit torn. A part of me wants to be with all of my blockmates and the other part wants to meet new people.
*My Finance subject is great.. Kaklase ko SIYA eh. I really don’t like him that much but I can never resist looking at those LIPS. Sobrang pula. Napapalingon nalang ako bigla. He always seems so lost and innocent. Awww! But then again…

CLICHÉ OF THE WEEK: He doesn’t even know I’m alive. He just passes me by.

summerskwela

I had it coming. I went to UST last Wednesday to enroll for my summer classes. Since I stopped for one semester, I have to take up at most three subjects to catch up with my blockmates. And as usual, even before I stepped foot at the gates of the school I knew something wrong would happen. It always happens in UST. The school would definitely test my patience for the nth time.

If you want to prove that UST has the most “bulok sistema” in Manila, you could just ask me and I would attest to that point right away. It was blazing hot when I went to room 101 to encode my subjects. I first chose History, English and Finance but the schedule of the first two overlapped so I had to cancel History. I then settled to NatSci but when I was about to encode it, the girl on the desk said that the slots for the subject haven’t been opened yet. WHY WOULD YOU FREAKING POST IN THE BULLETIN BOARD, “NATSCI ALREADY OPEN FOR SUMMER CLASSES” IF IN FACT IT ISN’T AVAILABLE YET?!?!? Katangahan to the extreme level!

The people there just told me to enroll first the two subjects that I wanted so I could already save a slot and then I could go back to check if slots for NatSci would open. I went to the oh-so-far-away seminary gym to pay my tuition. I fell in line and waited for my turn after at least 15 minutes. And then behold, I paid 8,900php for only two subjects. Ang mahal grabe! I went back to my building and OF COURSE, NatSci slots were still unavailable. I was so infuriated, irritated and most definitely TIRED that I just decided to go home and go back the next day.

I went very early last Thursday morning so that I could have it all done and go home at once. I was there at 7:30am. AND ONCE AGAIN, the guard told me that the encoding for summer classes would be at 9am. I started to laugh in front of him. I knew it would happen. It always happens! You know the feeling of so much anger that you were already on the verge of tears? That was me at that time. I was also battling the heat noh!

9am. I was in room 101 and I waited for several minutes because the laptop wouldn’t work. I kept going in front of the room to ask if the slots for NatSci were already available and they kept telling me to just wait. WTF?!?! When they finally told me that it was available, they said that the form I filled up was wrong because since I was just going to add a subject, I had to fill a different form. “WHY DIDN’T YOU TELL ME THAT A WHILE AGO?!?!” I went to the dean’s office to get the form. I filled it up and went straight to the seminary gym. The guy who was encoding it told me that I needed first the signature of a representative from the dean’s office. The fucking guy from the dean’s office forgot to sign it! I had no choice. You do what you gotta do. And so I went back to my building to get the signature from the dean’s office and then I went back to the gym. I was already raging mad at this point that I was already doing my “angas walk.” I was holding my ID and I swear I wanted to strangle each person I passed by with my lace.

When I was inside the gym again, I went straight to the guy before and gave him everything needed. There was another problem in the computer which made me blurt out, “Ano na naming problema?!?! Kahapon pa ako nandito ah!” The poor guy got so scared that he hurriedly ran my papers. I felt really sorry for him afterwards. He was just doing his job. I finally got my subjects together and it was all good in the end.

My schedule: (Monday-Friday)

7am-9am NATSCI
9am-11am ENGLISH
1pm-3pm FINANCE

TO UST: HINDI IBIG SABIHIN NA 400 YEARS NA KAYO AY KAILANGAN 400 YEARS OLD DIN ANG SISTEMA NIYO!

Random Notes:

*I know that he doesn’t read this but I actually saw Kevin during that whole thing because he’s doing Eco. We just said our hellos and the usual small talk. We didn’t do the entire enrolling thing together because I could already imagine the dead air and awkward silences that would transpire when we’re together. Kevin’s nice but we really didn’t have anything to talk about. Hihi!
*We bought a rabbit. His name is Pancakes after Summer’s rabbit in The O.C. He's cute and all but I really don't like animals and I'm scared of them which explains why in these pictures, my sister was holding him.





*Swimming with the family last Tuesday in Muntinlupa. Dur, nag-outing pa kame. Sobrang lapit lang. We had a karaoke session! Fun.









*MC’s album leaked. I downloaded it. So Good. I stay in looooovvvveeee! Will still buy the album of course.
*Summer classes start next week I really don’t know what to expect and I have no idea what I’m going to do with that two-hour break.
*Have you seen the episode of PBB with Josef and Nicole getting all munchy-munchy together? Idol ko na si Josef in making girls fall for him. Ang astig! He planned it all along: the supposedly tampo with Nicole and then making konsensya tapos magbabati sila. Nice!
*Robi!!!

PBBTEP

I haven’t been watching Pbb religiously this week because it’s been a bit crappy with the parents living also inside the house. What’s the deal with that?!? I kinda miss the plain big brother. Masyado nang maraming pakulo. Anyway, I will try to give my honest comments about the 14 housemates. And as I always do, I will rank them starting with my least favorite:


14. Jieriel
Ayoko sa lahat ang MAIINGAY! From the moment she stepped inside the house, her mouth has been unstoppable. Ang sarap i-masking tape…mali, stapler dapat para dumugo! She felt guilty because she was the only one who felt that Josef and Robi weren’t really friends. Yeah you should blame yourself. Dahil sa’yo, wala kayong makain! What’s also with her and her stepfather being so close? May relasyon ata yung dalawa eh. Lastly, I turned the volume down when she started making her graduation speech last Tuesday. If you saw that episode, you probably know why. I-evict na nga yan!


13. Jolas
I don’t like him. Medyo feeling gwapo kahit hindi naman! Plus, hindi ko siya maramdaman sa show. Invisible housemate.


12. Nan
He is slated as the “comedian” in the house but has yet to make me laugh. Hindi nga nagjo-joke eh. He’s just this plain-probinsyano-teenager inside the house. He’s not even goodlooking for me to enjoy watching him. I’m so mean!!!!!!!!


11. Rona
Just like Jolas, hindi ko sya maramdaman. All I know is that her father’s in jail. Kasama din sya dun sa graduation. Yun lang! Hindi sya exciting. She should strip naked one of these days or have sex with one of the guys for me to notice her. Kahit oral lang okay na.


10. Nicole
She’s pretty and all. She seems nice. She’s also easy on the eyes. Goody-goody. She should also do something big to have more screen time.


9. Linda
I didn’t like her at first because on the pilot, the camera had a close-up of her and her skin wasn’t that good. Sorry lang! Maganda siya sa malayo. Fargenic! Ahahaha! It’s great that they did that twirling baton acrobatic churva. At least, medyo naging bida siya dun. At umepal na naman si Jieriel sa pag-iyak. May katangahan moment din siya when she asked, "Dalawang beses ba dapat nagpapatuli?"


8. Kevin
Hot. Nice. Well-Behaved. Boring. Buti nalang gwapo siya.


7. Valerie
She’s very pretty. I think anyone who has a foreign blood is good looking. Anyway, I just noticed that a lot of the housemates have foreign blood. What’s with that? Parang hindi na PINOY Big Brother ah! Hindi na nabigyan ng chance yung mga totoong Pinoy talaga. Going back to Valerie, I really thought she’d be this bitchy type of housemate because well, she has the right to be and I think she can carry that image. She’s the prettiest in the batch. But in all fairness to her, she’s very nice and very friendly. She’s also soft-spoken which I truly love. Hindi tulad ni Jieriel! Ahahahaha!


6. Josef
This guy looks a bit like Geoff Eigenmann He’s cute. Hindi naman conyo kahit taga-La Salle at sobrang kasundo niya sina Alex at Kevin. I like him especially last week when he and Robi still had the best buds forever task. Seemed gayish! Love it.


5. Alex
The first time I saw him I thought he was gay because he resembles Uma. But then Luis said that Alex is currently in a relationship with a Filipina. So I guess he’s not gay. He was so funny when he thought that Josef would really circumcise him the traditional Filipino way. Man if I was in his place, I’d be screaming my lungs out and get out of the house right away! He was also a very good actor when he did that April Fool’s prank.

MY BIG FOUR:


4. Beauty
She’s really funny. I always look for her whenever I watch. She always has her moments which make me love her even more. She’s not that pretty but she has charm written all over her. She apparently had a scandal of some sort which made her school prevent her from graduating. Sad.


3. Ejay
Two words: ORGASM INCARNATE!


2. Robi
I sooooo love him! What I like in a guy changes from time to time but now I’m into that geeky-nerdy-shy-introvert-laidback-simple type so I guess Robi fits in that category perfectly. He never had a girlfriend. Gay? I hope. Ahahah! And that smile!!!!!!!!!!! Gorgeous smile. Never fails to melt my well-shaped scrotum. Kidding.


1. Priscilla
This girl is my Big Winner. From the moment I learned she’s deaf, I knew that she’s my bet all the way. She’s very charismatic. Sobrang sexy! She failed to be Miss Teen Philippines because she wasn’t able to hear the buzzer. Laughtrip mhen! Plus, I can do a mean impression of her. “May problem kasi ako sa ear” Harhar! There was also this heartbreaking episode when she started to cry when she told Jieriel her worries of being deaf like not having a job, a man who would love her, etc. I hope she wins.

Random Notes:

*Next week yung sa mga parents naman nila. Joke.
*Ang tagal ng April 15. Kating-kati na singit ko. Mariah gained her 18th #1 single in the US with Touch My Body. Wuhoo!
*My mom just bought my 5-year-old niece her own cellphone. I completely disagreed with this because she’s just too young. I told my mom and my sister not to buy her any gadgets yet because she should learn to love first the simple things in life.
*I went to Trinoma last Tuesday for the first time. I love their PowerBooks!
*I saw a lot of gay novels at National Book Store. Pero puta, ang mamahal! More or less 700php!
*Michael Johns’ performance last Wednesday on American Idol was just amazing. The sexiest voice ever!
*Jesse McCartney has a new song, Leavin’. I love everything about this song especially the “G5, G5” part. Nice! It was produced by The Dream who also did Rihanna’s Umbrella and of course Mariah’s Touch My Body. The critics love it. He’s starting to do R&B records now. It’s a great departure form his uber-pop songs before. I also love the video. I never knew he could be THAT hot! You get a glimpse of his pits (oh, fetish!). Disney Channel (which was a Jesse McCartney-favored network) wouldn’t play it because they thought the vid was suggestive and a little too much for their young viewers. Anyway here it is: